relocation
The Dubai Color Run: The Happiest 5K on the Planet — Except for Planet Gina’s House
My husband asked the questions only left brain people think about. They think about all of the details that are about as much fun as a turd in a punch bowl. After three months of anticipation my husband is putting the kabosh on my enthusiasm and seriously killing my buzz.
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My Neighbors: The Crack Heads without Crack
They ran, squatted, and did sit-ups in the neighborhood garden every morning. I didn’t have the heart to tell them their mat was located directly on top of my dogs favorite dumping grounds.
MoreThe Land of the Housemaids
“She used to sit, watch TV, and eat all day. Not even one hour work a day. When we went out, she only ordered the Ribeye and the shrimps. One day she woke up and I swear she was possessed… Screaming Allah in the backyard and making cou-cou and ouah-ouah sounds…. the next day it got louder. I knew I had to send her back when she put a white towel on her head and started walking like a mummy. It was FREAKY!”
MoreIn the Beginning
Eventually I weeded through all the weird and funky stuff such as KFC (they serve odd pieces of the bird that I didn’t even know existed — second thought, is it a bird? And what really ticked me off is a hamburger bun in lieu of a biscuit. Freaking commies), Dominos is just awful, Pizza Hut serves ketchup with the pizza, Hardees has odd combinations that no true American would be caught dead putting in their mouth, and then there is Subway. Thank GOD for Subway.
MoreThe Election
The absolutely worst scenerio for me. Here we are, most of us are in the UAE for the first time. Probably just arrived a month ago, feeling completely and utterly lost, and I am running against someone who has the answers to the questions on the minds of everyone in this room. Such as, where do I find Charmin toilet paper? A gas station? And Miracle Whip? I prepared a strategy which usually works for me. In a pinch crack a joke. Yes, absolutely, this is what I will do. And then it dawned on me. How exactly do I win the Korean vote? I’ve never gotten the punchline to a Korean joke — have you?
MoreA Buffet of Life
Me, on the other hand, wanted to slap him for wasting our time. I gave him a serious what the hell is wrong with you look and we returned to our hotel with our excitement squashed and a sad feeling of uncertainty.
MoreImmigrants and Bill
At first they are a little frightening because as Americans we are not used to seeing people from areas that are so poor and so under-developed, and at first, these people appeared barbaric but eventually I got used to seeing them and realized that I have nothing to worry about because the crime rate here is very low and the place is extremely safe.
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